Francesca

Wow, I haven't come to realize just how late I'm commenting today. Well what happened with this comment is that the most recent version of my comment was not actually copied, but I really only have a copy of the version prior to a few revisions. The post can be found here and here is the comment, keep in mind that it is in fact subject to change once the comment if approved and is displayed underneath her post.

"Hello Francesca,

Great job reflecting on what troubles you encountered during the progress of your project as well as how you have benefited from it. I also noticed that in your post you signified the explicit importance of teamwork.

So if you didn't have to carry out this project in a group, how do you think your approach or overall appeal to the project would have changed? On another note, you quickly described how you realized one should act when working with an organized group. During the course of this project, were there any other qualities or virtuous attributes that would detail a good leader that were either frequently shown or altogether neglected? And overall, what do you think constitutes a good leader? What about a good group member?

If it helps, try to think about other moments in your life when you undertook a leadership position and you might be able to reflect upon them to extract some of the aforementioned qualities in question. I think that reflecting on work that you have completed before is undoubtedly where you can achieve the potential for maximum growth in your character.

Now before I depart, I really hope that you had a great holiday season and I'd like to wish you a happy new year! Have a great 2008. =)

Arrivederci,
MrSiwWy - Student Mentor"

Brianna

Well before I completed this comment on Brianna's blog, I attempted to verify whether Graeme had already commented on her blog recently or not. It just so happens that he has in fact posted a comment on a blog by Brianna... though that comment pertained to a different Brianna (phew). Anyway, the basis of this comment lies within the post here.

"Hello Brianna,

It's really great to see how you've succinctly identified not only how you have grown due to the completion of this project, but also where improvements could be made for future endeavors.

Do you think that if this project were entirely oriented around a single classroom (and not over the internet in any way) you would have received the same overall benefit from the project? How do you think that manipulating the way a project or assignment is to be completed alters the educational value of the project? Do you think that completing such projects in the same manner each time takes away from the intrigue and benefit of the project in any way? What about a task requiring a unique approach or method to complete?

Now as I stated earlier, you've successfully identified any downfalls you encountered during this project and how they can be compensated for in the future, but I think you should heed your own suggestions and future tasks head on and really think about them prior to starting another task. If you continually think about what went wrong last time before you start with a new task, it would probably contribute to your progression as a student or with almost anything that you may encounter.

Take care,
MrSiwWy
Student Mentor"

Not entirely sure when I'll have free time again in the near future, but my next comment probably will not be until then (though I'll probably post a few during the break).

Michael

I think I might have been a tad overzealous when I was commenting on Michael's blog, but the thoughts consistently poured out. Here is the comment, and you can find this comment and the corresponding post here, hope it was a great one.

"Hey there Michael,

Good job with your post summarizing these two chapters, though there might be some grammatical errors that you can fix. I find that writing a lot, even outside of school, tends to contribute to your progression and skill with using language in meaningful yet elegant methods. Also, I think you did a great job staying concise and right to the point with the ideas in your post.

Now, as I read through your post, I was particularly intrigued the statement: “The sounds of the shot then the pain and suffering you can hear is painful…” Did you intend for this statement to be entirely literal or did you attempt to implicate something deeper? Have you ever learned anything on double meanings? And if you really did intend this to be an implicit emotional conveyance, do you think that you can apply emotions that you felt or feel have a great connection with to any other events in these chapters?

There’s nothing wrong with trying to imply deeper meaning, in fact it might give the audience more insight into the significance of your statement and might even be used to project it’s true meaning or any accompanying moods or emotions that may be applicable. I find it to be good habit to try to expand the methods in which you approach your writing endeavours and in any way try to say as much as you can with as succinctly as possible.

Note that if there is any vocabulary present in my comment that you might not be familiar with, it would probably be a good idea to research then to help expand your overall language skills. Don’t be deterred by large words; try to let them entice you to pursue more knowledge.

Cheers,
MrSiwWy"

Darn it, I forgot to indicate that I'm a student mentor. =/ Though I hope that someone informs him or that he is already aware of this fact.

Tyler

My first mentoring comment for the "Thinwalled classroom" blog, and I must say that it took a while to analytically dissect the students' posts to find something I could constructively comment on to help them with their educational endeavors. This first post was in response to a post on Tyler's blog which can be found here, in which he presented a synopsis of the final chapters as well as his interpretation of the story's finale. Here is the comment in full:

"Hello Tyler!

First off, I’d like to say that you did a good job summarizing of the final chapters of the novel. In fact, it turned out to be a great review of the novel for me (it’s been quite a while), so I thank you for that! (= There was one thing that caught my eye in your post, however.

Towards the conclusion of your post you stated that “Survivel best tells these chapters”. How do you believe that this characteristic (Survival) fits the ending of the story more so than any other? What idea or event in the final chapters of the story do you think best signify survival? Moreover, how do you think that the story or it’s ending would have changed if survival didn’t play such a large role in these chapters?

Don’t be discouraged to think outside of the box or to try to take on a unique perspective on something. It’s great to expand the way you look at things, since there isn’t always one definite way to approach an idea or concept.

Take care,
MrSiwWy - Student Mentor"

I know the format is very similar to Graeme's, but I thought consistency throughout the blog shouldn't hurt anyone.